when my son came home from prison last sept. i had really worked my recovery hard everyday trying to prepare for him. i treated him well, i let him know that i loved him,told him everyday, just like i always had.i kept my mouth shut about everything.i kept all my opinions to my self.i had heard a new say"Lord,keep one hand on my shoulder & the other over my mouth".i wrote it on my black board (it is still there) & i praticeced it. when he was arrested in dec..(not using) i was heartbroken.i still pratice this.i do not discuss his recovery at all with him.that works for me.set your boundries from the start. prayers everything goes good for you & her.