The whole of your post still screams one thing:
What you want him to do so you will retain your financial standing and not have to face the loss of that.
Beyond that, it is even more manipulative... you want him to get treatment and go to rehab and get better and treat you like a loving husband and Father to your kids.. and "live happlily ever after."
First of all, get over the financial dream. Do it now while you can. You are relying on a drug addict to provide you with your life style. It is high time you simply faced the fact that life is NOT going to go on like that. It MAY go on like that, but probably not. Your husband is a coke head. He may become, or may already be, a crack head. Yes. Just like the guys in the bad part of town sitting in vacant door ways with no place to go but to figure out how to get their next hit. Just like the homeless addicts you see on the street. He is the SAME as them. Would you rely on any of those folks to support you and your kids? Not likely. Just because your husband wears a suit and a tie to work and is a professional does not mean he will stay in that status. HE IS A DRUG ADDICT.
You wnat him to go to rehab and get better. I do not think there is a person here who is involved with an addict who does not want the same thing. No matter WHAT the legal system says.. not matter what the courts say... not matter what your husband says.. this is UP TO HIM. Recovery is not a finished product EVER. You work it every day for the rest of your life to stay sober. Same for us codies.
Until he hits bottom (he has a LONG way to go from the sound of your posts) and until YOU hit bottom (and you too have a long way to go) you are going to continue to play this game.. back and forth..
You and he are as locked together the same as fighting bucks with tangled antlers!
Sadly, by doing this game.. the back and forth.. this attempt to manipulated the outcome.. you are creating suffering. Terrible cost and suffering.. and the people who are suffering? Not you and not your husband.. it is your game. YOUR KIDS ARE THE ONES WHO WILL SUFFER.
In the end, they would be better off without the chaos in a small apartment surrounded with peace and living smaller than staying where they are in the midst of the horror and drama you and your husband are creating. And yes, you AND he are creating this.
I am sorry if this sounds like I am riding over you a bit rough shod, but I really hate to see kids in the middle of such a thing.
Last edited by Elana; 07-09-2007 at 05:57 AM.