I am so sorry you are going through all of this. You sound so strong and with a good direction to head towards. I think it’s so wise and heart warming you are turning towards your son to help both of you heal from this relationship. Your compassion for her daughter is commendable, but I agree, you need to cut all ties with her family. If her mother is in denial and no one else in the family steps up to face the reality of this situation then maybe her daughter will be better off with a foster family. I understand your concern here in NJ about that whole situation but let’s hope that enough light has been cast on child services that they do there jobs correctly from now on.
I think getting through the next few weeks will be hard and frustrating and of course drama filled but it’s only a few weeks then it will all be over. I also wouldn’t be too quick to de solve the restraining/protection order. Don’t use that as a bargaining chip with thoughts of an active addict actually listening and following rules of any kind especially if it’s her family or brother doing the negotiating on her part. I would allow the courts to decide that one. You’ll drop your part she’ll drop hers only for it all to begin again after her next drug binge or with her lack of funds, you’ll be her target for a while if you drop this order now. If you want the nightmare to be over, finally over then stick to your guns and do the right thing for YOU and YOUR son not what her family thinks is best for her.