hi wyshy and welcome to SR!!
Its a great place , you will learn a ton here .
My husband is an alcoholic and I am an enabler too . Its seems that just by doing nothing except what has to be done you are an enabler . Didnt make sense to me at first but it does now . I enabled him to continue drinking but taking all responsibility away from him . I took care of the kids , the house , the bills , the schedules , even paying his union dues and filling out his steward reports . All the while I thought I was just doing what had to be done .
Once I was able to let go and live for myself (and my kids) I realized all the enabling I had done ! Hind sight really is 20/20!
Keep posting and tell us more about yourself .. Keep going to al-anon and keep an open mind .. I learned from here that you 'take what you need and leave the rest'!
M