dw,
What is your attorney telling you to do about all this? He/she should be guiding you in gathering evidence.
My attorney filed a contempt motion for every single phone call (she had me take pictures of my cell phone call log with a digital camera and print them out) and for every single time exah came to the house. She told me to save all the voice mails; I borrowed a tape recorder and recorded all of them for her. I had three police visits documented as well, even though he had already left by the time the officers got here.
I already had numerous pictures of him with powder in his nose and the actual dope I scraped up off the counters, the pen barrels, etc. Do you have anything like that?
He is really playing dirty; please keep yourselves safe no matter what you have to do. I'm praying for you!