my older daughter is going to be very upset when i tell her there can be no contact between her and her dad outside of visitation at least until next week. I hope she understands that it is out of my hands, but i dont think that she will. I feel so bad for my kids...especially my older one who is 12--she is at such a tough age,.it is actually the same age I was when my parents seperated..but i didnt have any real relationship with my dad and i was with my friends all the time. She is embarrassed that this has happened and doesnt want anyone to know. None of her friends have gone through this, so i understand how she feels. I was there too at 12 years old and it is very difficult.