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Old 06-13-2007, 05:00 PM
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drainedwife
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: jacksonville, florida
Posts: 341
its over....at least today is over

hi everyone....
we went to court today and it got adjourned because he had a criminal lawyer with him and he needed a matrimonial one. His lawyer didnt understand things, so we just ammmended the original temp. restraining order to include visitation with the kids and a few small items regarding finances. Our lawyers met and mine discussed everything with him.

we have to now go back next week. My ah then called me after court AGAIN and left messages on my cell phone that said i am so low because i gave my lawyer an email he wrote to me and he also said that he isnt going to fight the divorce, but he doesnt want to use lawyers becasue it will cost a fortune. he will give me 50% of everything and we can go to a mediator.. he also seemed to indicate that he was not going to get evaluated for substance abuse or the other things which i requested if there was to be any reconciliation.
also, my lawyer called his to tell him he called me 3 times and his lawyer yelled at him...he did try to call me again, but my mailboxes were full so he couldnt leave a message...but my lawyer said he has never seen anything like this were someone so blatanly violates an order like this...my ah told my friend he doesnt care--he doesnt care if he is violating it or he gets arrested because it would be worth it if he could just talk to me.

so it seems like my ah has made his choice...he is not going to do whatever it takes to get the family back together as he said he would to my friend. He also said on the voicemail that he is not violent, that he never put his hands on my neck and that i have the problem because i dont take my anti-depressant every day it makes me not think clearly... and i need to watch how i take prescription drugs and i should look at the symptoms of skipping doses. His lawyer also mentioned someting like this to my lawyer and my lawyer said you dont want to go there, ill pretend like i didnt hear that.

anyway, thanks for your support......i am so glad that i have all of you to support me...funny, i still feel bad for him....I know he is very angry with me and still feels like he has done nothing wrong. i feel like i am doing something bad to him...but at the same time i know that he has done it all by himself.....

also, ive read alot of posts from others that say their ah's have stopped on their own..and then i feel -- did i do this too soon?? no, cant be---i gave him a yr. and a half to change or get help....and it didnt happen.....why should i have to live with abuse, drugs, and whatever else he had thrown at me.......

my older daughter does not understand why daddy still cant call her or why she ahs to go to grandmas to see dadday..she is at the difficult age of 12 and she is not handling this well at all.. i dont want to give her too much info. but she keeps asking questions...i havent told her about the drug use and dont want to right now. She has seen the abuse and understands that is wrong, but i guess this is her daddy and she wants the family to be together no matter what....
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