Hi, I can't tell you how happy I am to hear this-that you are going to see the DV counselor and I am happy that you are going to have this time with no contact with the husband so you can have the space to think about yourself and kids....!!
His dad is clueless....
Remeber when i was talking about strangulation and the change in laws here....I was looking at some documents on line for my state about this and here are some excerpts from what I found....sorry it's kind of long, but I just think it is very eye-opening and interesting. (you could print this and show it to the AH's dad.)
[QUOTE]
"“Strangulation is often one of the last abusive acts committed by a violent domestic partner before murder.”
2004 Report, Hennepin County Domestic Fatality Review Team
The prosecutor stated, “If you look at the domestics that end in murder, almost all of them were precipitated by strangulation.” Since the majority of strangulations were previously charged as misdemeanors many people were unaware of how common strangulation is in domestic violence and how dangerous it is for victims.
Minnesota Coalition for Battered Women (MCBW) with the assistance of WATCH and its member programs, pushed for the creation of a specific felony statute for domestic strangulation during the 2005 legislative session. With the passage of this law, Minnesota became one of six states (including North Carolina, Missouri, Oklahoma, Nebraska and Idaho) that have felony strangulation laws.
A judge stated, “There is an acknowledgement that one person could kill another. People generally don’t think of domestic violence as something that can result in death. This legislation calls attention to how seriously one can hurt another.” A county attorney said, “Misdemeanor charges do not sufficiently address the seriousness of the crime.” A law enforcement officer echoed with, “When someone rises to the level of strangulation, a big part of me thinks it should be an attempted murder. I look at every domestic as the next possible homicide.”
Several of the probation officers and city attorneys interviewed said strangulation is a “red flag” for them and that they pay closer attention to these cases. [QUOTE]
My DV teacher, who was a former police officer and investigator in DV cases told us that it is very easy to strangle someone...it only takes something like 10lbs. of pressure for a short amount of time. Sorry i can't remember exactly-that class was 2 yrs. ago.
ANYWAY, I understand Drained how you feel when you wonder why you put up with these things, i have struggled with wondering these things too, and I felt mad at myself and foolish for a while, but I'm getting over that now...it is just part of the process of recovery I guess!
I want to tell you again how happy i am that you are going to DV counseling and you seem to be making decisions that are going to result in a happy healthier life for you and your kids!!!
Last edited by raerae6; 06-11-2007 at 10:12 PM.