I think that you have to do for yourself today, nothing has to be forever, should he seek recovery down the road then maybe a knew picture can be painted, but for today...protect yourself in every which way you can....emotionally, physically and financially. I think you might be feeling like you are being disloyal to him as a wife, I know I did when I had to go to a lawyer 4 years ago, but had I not made that step and got somethings in order I would be down the tube with no roof over our heads.
This lawyer put on a Certificate of Pending Litigation on the family home...meaning if any of his creditors tried to sue and lien the house that they would be last in line....I was 1st...so if he get nothing out of the home, neither do his creditors....if he gets anything, he creditors get it. But they can't touch my part. Thank god because he has so many credit cards and gas cards maxed....cash advanced...oooohhh man.
One of the best things that happened as well is no contact....nothing. Any contact I had with him and he would get me all confused....no e-mails, no phone call, no messages. My husband would have me self doubting myself, not until he was no longer around was I able to get my thinking straight. Even after one year, I met with him....I went back to doubting, he has this control over me that can change my thoughts and views. I haven't been able to work this out within myself yet...so I know I still have to stay as far away from him as I can.
Rose