Originally Posted by
jsjohnson72 
I have a boyfriend that I have been on and off with for 14 years. He went to 3 month treatment facility last year and got out in Nov that is when we got back together and started taking things serious.
He started drinking not that long after he got out and smokes weed. He said he doesn't have a problem because he isn't doing coke.
He says I give up to easily and just leave him.
I just need to walk away but it is sooooo hard!!
I don't want to do this for the rest of my life.
Welcome! You will find a lot of support here. There's a lot of people having the same problem as you.
I have a good idea of what you are going through. My ex bf was a crackhead. I was with him for 3 1/2 yrs. until this Feb.
He had a problem with it before I met him. Was off it when I met him and started back on it after we had been together for about 9 months. (He later told me that he did it occasionally during that first 9 mos., but hid it).
So during about a 2 year period he put himself in rehab twice and went to jail twice.
Each time he got out of rehab or jail he swore he was going to be clean.
Each time he started with booze and pot and in two weeks time he was back on crack....just as bad as before. He thought he could drink and smoke pot without using anything else, but it never turned out that way.
It sounds like your man is in DENIAL just like mine was.
I got my hopes up everytime he said he was gonna quit. Finally i sort of 'bottomed out' and realized that he was maybe sadly enough NEVER going to quit. I couldn't take it anymore. The lies, stealing, drama, having this problem that I hid from almost everyone.
It is so sad because everyone has good qualities and IF ONLY they would get sober things would be great. There are things about my ex that I miss alot.
You are making a lot of progress! You read the book-you know what to do! Believe me I know how hard it is!
He says you give up too easy...maybe HE gives up too easy!!
You said that you don't want to live the rest of your life this way. If you stay with him there is a good chance that you will live your life this way.
Read that book again. Start setting some boundries that you can stick to. Or even just one. pick one that you know you will stick with. it will make you feel stronger and then as you go you will get stronger and stronger and not feel so out of control in the situation.
Also protect your $$ and remember one thing please. You cannot trust him!
(((hugs)))