Thanks all.
It's a constant struggle to break out of the codie mindset- that his addiction is my problem and I am controlled by it.
I STILL feel like it's my problem to be worrying about and it's frustrating to have to constantly remind myself otherwise- that I am the ONLY one I can change and I am responsible for my choics and actions. It feels guilty do this but at the same time he did not feel guilty lying and betraying and deceiving me for so long??
There is so much anger bubbling and hurt. I want acceptance to bring peace.