I am so sorry that you are having to deal with you DH's issues. Sometimes we are tossed into the dysfunction ourselves when we get involved with our Signifigant Others. Please remember that your partners struggles are NOT your struggles. There is NOTHING that you can help your DH with. And you can NOT save your DH. Your partner needs to work through these issues emotionally. Being an ACOA is a process. He can only struggle through this process internially when he makes the decision to help himself. It seems like he is going in a possitive direction with counseling. Please remember that YOU can't work through these problems for your DH(this is a trap that guilt pushes us into sometimes). Try as much as you possibly can to detach yourself from the situation.
Setting boundries are difficult - agian this is a process - an internial emotional process. You are going to have to learn to build these boundries the same way your husband is going to have to learn to work his way through being an ACOA. You can support your DH through his process by all mean - but supporting him doesn't mean taking on responsibility for his problems. This responsibility lies squarley on his shoulders - and only he can decide when, if , and how he will get well. Like I said detach your self as much as possible from his problem. Drawn the line where you feel comfterable and not an inch closer or further back.