I consider myself an orthodox, by the book AA'er.
I encourage people to think for themselves and don't consider it "anti-AA." In the book Alcoholics Anonymous, it tells me to honestly ask myself what these spiritual terms mean to me. Which I take to mean "Find out for yourself! Don't impose what I think I know onto them or take anyone else's word. Get a good dictionary and find out."
Prior to the Third Step, the book helps me to make sure I AM ready to take that step. No one knows I'm ready but me. Then in the sex conduct inventory (Fourth Step), it says that counsel with others is often desirable, in the end I let God (my conscience) be the final judge. I think that this applies to any and all situations in life, not just sex.
When, after a Fifth Step, I've returned home and been quiet for an hour reviewing the work I've done so far, it says this "If I can answer these questions to MY satisfaction (Not my sponsor's satisfaction), then I am ready to look at Step Six.
At Step Ten, I'm restored to sanity (right thinking) and proper use of the will. At Step Eleven it says that God gave me a brain to use and I can use it and rely on it all I wish when my thinking is clear of wrong motives and placed upon a higher plane. I come to rely on intuitive thought.
The people that helped me along the path of my spiritual quest in AA told me to follow my heart.l I encourage you to do the same, Angulimala, whether in or out of AA.
A sidenote-I've read the book "Powerfully Recovered'" and agree 100% with the author. I see too many in AA that are afraid to take responsibility for their own lives, but instead sit in AA meetings blindly following the heard, nodding their heads and talking what I call "fellowship speak" and spreading the myths that kill alcoholics.
Jim