Old 05-19-2007, 07:57 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
teke
grateful rca
 
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: atlanta, ga.
Posts: 4,671
for me i think it was fear of the unknown coupled with a lot of stuffed painful issues from the past that i would have rather stayed high than to work through because i just didn't realize that they were there all covered over all along. once i found out the difference in the way i felt with drugs as oppose to the constant subconscience hurting in my heart, it felt better for a while to stay medicated, i was just so tired of hurting and drugs gave me a release if it was only for that second, that was until the drugs created even more pain causing me to need more drugs to medicate the pain.

when i finally did go to rehab and this last time i went, i had a counselor who helped me one on one to work the steps, working through those past painful issues and the fears, i realize how much lighter i felt and how much less i wanted to or had a reason to medicate. as the pain got less intense, the less i need drugs, so here i am
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