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Old 05-17-2007, 10:50 AM
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itiswhatitis...
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: somewhere, out there...
Posts: 512
"does god have a clock?"

that's what 4 year old nephew asked - i told him god would know when it was time for him and his 2 yr old brother to go home - he originally asked when his mom and dad would be better? - when they would come and pick him up? - you have to be honest right? - god will know the right time - i h ope his clock is working...

i'm crying now - these poor kids - i've had my moments of hysterics - when the two year old is pulling my two year olds hair or pouring paint over his head or scratching his face - but all, in all, it's been ok - or getting better...

- i can't do this by myself anymore - my husband has been helping with the kids - i don't mean that - i just mean supporting the kids mentally and financially - sister and bf were supposed to call everyday and talk to the kids - that was after sister had 2 weeks inpatient - in a week and a half they've called three times - they've sent $100 - they've promised they have money and they'll send it - i don't believe them anymore - they tell me i'm not supportive of their recovery efforts because i ask them honest questions - ie; if neither of you have jobs how will you pay for food, housing, etc...- they scream they hav eto get off the phone - honest my a$$...

today i called every social service office in illinois and indiana - i told them i need help - some sort of counseling for the kids - financial assistance - something - no one has called back - in two hours no one has called - i've managed to somehow f*&^ up the checking account (by hoping a mortgage pymt would be a day late - who am i kidding) it's my fault - money is money - i messed up - i thought sister and bf were truthful and would send the $ they said they would - why????????

let go and let god - let go and let god - it will be allright - the universe is unfolding as it should - i just needed to vent - and pray a l ittle - god grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to know the difference -and god - could you tell me what time it is?...

love,
s
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