Interstring post. One of the conditions I was allowed to move back in with my wife were that she could, and I would willingly take, a drug test at her request. I immidiately agreed. I do find it tough to be doubted sometimes, like when I get asked about where money went, where I was etc.
But, this is the situation I created.
I am really trying to recover in the complete sense of the word. So honesty, truth, and being a more loving human are important.
My wife is just trying to come to terms with living with an addict, and let the past go. However, I feel i must bend in her direction wherever possible. If a drug test gives her peace of mind so be it.
It was an early condition on getting back together.
Frankly, since I am clean, I do not realy care too much. Same with the questions about where I was and money. I stole and lied so much, I can answer honestly now, and each truth I tell hopefully begins to dim the memory of the lies.
She has never given me a drug test in 18 month.
Cos like many of yuo said, behaviour tells a lot.
When I relapse (in old addict behaviour, but abstain) she picks it up.
I shared my porn viewing story here.
She picked up from my behaviour something was wrong.
But as an addict I will do what it I feel I need to in order to build trust.