Dear Rozied,
When I read your first post, I had to ask myself, why is her son calling her to tell her he relapsed? This must be some kind of set-up he doing to her, like he doesn't have his rent or something because of what happened with his job at the post office.
By the time I got to your third post and he had become angry I knew for sure. A few months ago I read the "The Manipualtive Child" by E.W. Swihart Jr., M.D. & Patrick Cotter, Ph.D.
It made such a difference in how I saw what my RAB had been doing when he was using. Before, I had been so baffled by his quick mood changes that it would throw me off balance. After reading that book I didn't fall for it again. What was really interesting was that after I started not falling for the first tactic he would switch to the next. After a few attempts he would just stop and apologize.
I wish I would have read that book when I first got sober. I could not figure out why life wasn't working for me. I now understand it was because I had been able to manipulate my parents from a very young age. They loved me.
The advice you received above was right on. I especially appreciate Cats via Moose "I love you so much, you're so smart, I know you'll find your way".....
These are perfect!
Lithloren