Snooping always made me feel worse...it made me face what I already knew.
Then I had to enforce my bounderies, I had no choice, I was in the corner and I knew the truth.
I never had the money issues, as, we were not married and we had nothing in "our" names, knew better than that from the beginning. My father drummed that in my head as a child, and, even through my marriages, I had my own
money and one house as mine. Thank you Dad, you saved me in that respect, if it wasn't for him, I would have been screwed.
Snooping does become a habit, and one that can be difficult to break.
As for the credit report thing, you can get one on line, if you know his infro.
And, if there are credit lines in both SS#'s it will pop up on your credit report.