Ok, I get it that I am trying to change him. But help me out, I was trying to start small and choose something I would like to change. I understand that I can't change him. If I can't change him and he doesn't choose to change, then how can the situation ever change? So that gets me right back to accept the situation the way it is or get out. Only two choices, just accept the unacceptable and shut up about it.
Now I know I can change me. I can put a funny sign on the vaccume or I can hide the lawn mower or I can just put it away myself. So once again I am doing all of the compromising. I am doing all of the accepting of things I don't like.
What am I missing about boundaries? Maybe I don't have boundary issues at all. Maybe I just don't like him very much and don't like much of what he does? Maybe I am just super critical because I feel so abandoned in the relationship. Maybe if he wasn't spiritually sinking into a black hole, this stuff wouldn't matter. I think most of all I can't abide the soul sickness of it all.
Boy am I confused today.