I too found that in my situation, discussing it with then ex's family was only my angle (however unaware I was of this angle) of manipulating the outcome to go in a way I desired. I also was hurt many times by things I said and thought were' in confidence' and were said to 'help' my ex and were then repeared to him, making who the villian...you guessed it....me.
Utahman, welcome
Glad you decided to post!