Queen - sorry it took so long for me to get back to this thread but I had continuing ed in Covington the last couple of days....
Huney....you are not spoiled by his income you are trapped by it...like I was for 22 years !!!!
Take the classes and start living YOUR life - if he is in it then he's in it and if he's not - cuz he wont like the fact that you getting one..then he's not.
Like I said and many others here have said - start putting some money away and start there and it grows pretty fast - you'll see...
New York huh? Not a community property state..hmmm. Consult with an attorney and then sit back and contemplate what the MAN says...notice I say what the MAN says? Female attorneys in my opinion and it is just my opinion will have you settle for less than what you can get...I have no idea why - well yes I do but we wont go into that right now...take the time - all the time you need and decide what you want to do....it may be that once you start these classes the two of you wont be around each other very much and things subside for awhile for you and these classes will give you an education in alcoholoism as well as insight into HIS mind. He may after you start taking these classes resent it greatly that you are doing this and may take it out in anger....stay the course....stay the course....stay the course.
Don't buy into his manipulation tactics. after 22 years your spouse knows ALL of your buttons to push...well its time you got some new ones added. Ones that he hasnt figured out yet. Ones that when pushed - give YOU the upper hand and not him.
I noticed in this thread you mention that he has beer because he felt that you made him angry? I also noticed that he didnt lose one bit of sleep over it either did he? This was a flash back for me...so many many times my XAH caused arguments with me or the kids and then went straight to bed and was snoring in 5 minutes....when he awoke ususally in the very early a.m. he never apologized for any of it...just went along his merry little way and we all had to just suck it up and live with whatever he wanted to dish out....
I'm thinking of you today and just wanted you to know that sweetie.
Janit