You are trapped no doubt about it....it is very hard to walk away when the rest of your life is good--he seems to be the only problem in it/...even women who have no life with the A stay--so don't be so hard on yourself. Make a plan and stick to it.What a waste it would be if a nice person like you spent every night crying into your pillow-and riddles with anxiety....you mat find that even though you have to sacrifice material things-it might be worth it just to find YOU again,,you would be suprized how much you can do without and still be happy---hang in there.....