Sickofit,
No wisdom to add to the wonderful stuff above.
I've been where you are and I know how angry and sad it all must make you. But know that this is going to make things easier in the long run. My anger at my X's infidelity was the key to finally detaching from him, and after the first few days/weeks of pain it started getting easier and easier and easier.
Just like going through surgery to save your life ----- it hurts a lot in post-op, but after that you're so much stronger.
Sending you hugs and strength to get through this, and get on with the business of building a happy life for yourself.
Love,
GL