I too came to the realization that I was not the crazy one my AH made me out to be when I found this forum.
My AH is currently working on detoxing the past 2 months and quit drinking 5 months ago. During the time he was drinking and using, if I ever questioned him about anything he would either; 1. Tell me I wasn't his mother and it was not my responsibility. 2. Lie 3. Blame me, it was my fault that he need to use. That one always made me laugh, which really made him mad. 4. And of course, say I was crazy and he didn't have a problem. 5. Oh, yeah, and he would point out everyone of my flaws and repeatedly tell me about them sometimes for hours at a time.
As you can figure, I found it easier to not question him.
Reading everyone's stories made me realize that I needed to take some positive action for myself and my children's sake and stop ignoring his problem. I decided it would was time to talk to the kids about it, I felt they should know why their dad is so up and down with his moods, etc. I was very careful not to attack their dad personally and just point out that he had an illness right now because of his overuse of the prescriptions he was taking and the alcohol. I wanted them to know that they could come to me if they ever had questions or were scared, etc. Well, midway through our talk my son tells me that he doesn't know who to believe now because his dad told them that I was going through a midlife crises and was not emotionally stable.
That pretty much sealed the 'You're not crazy after all' deal for me.