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Old 03-19-2007, 10:18 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
SaTiT
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: anomaly
Posts: 2,180
Bigsis..you would ask.
A combination of everything.
A friend set me up.lol There I was telling her all the time that she needed
help and she had the problem. i didn't have a problem.lol
She'd just gotten out of treament and need a ride to some weird meeting
name AA. i just set in my car but got ask to go in and have some cofee.
Them crazy people threw the BB and me.lmaf I thought it was a joke.

Then she took me to another meeting. I wanted to throw up.
it wasn't from the alcohol. i only had a couple. It was from hearing
what people were sharing. All the damn crap i didn't want to deal with
and had sholve deep inside of me. To top it off, i wanted to run but my
legs became numb or fell asleep for some damn reason.

I basically destroyed my life in front of her eyes, wihtin 3 months.
Good job, nice house, nice car and all that crap.
I actully didn't have problems finding work..for some damn reason.
I slept in my car becuase home was a wreck and i was way out there.
It was a given that I lost everything on the outside. i did it on purpose.

I lost everything inside of me. Incomprehenceable demorlazation
as some would call it.

Just the pain, it never went away no matter how much drugs or
alcohol I use. The people in AA had what i wanted. They seem
happy and they seem to know my pain and had found a way out.
AA bascially love me unconditionally...them folks put up with me.
I though they were going to teach me how to drink like a gentalman.lol
No I didn't want to stop...i just hung around long enough
for AA to mess up my buzz.
It took me over 6 months for me to get my first 90 days.
I keep coming back no matter what...nothing made sense most of the time.
I just hung on to that.


I belive it was devine intervention or the grace of god.
Because i was really, really wack out. Just alot of events
that i can't really explain.

Last edited by SaTiT; 03-19-2007 at 10:40 AM.
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