Expectations
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Join Date: Apr 2013
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Expectations
Expectations
Some Expectations Are Reasonable, Some Not
~By Buddy T
I spent years trying to change someone else and years looking after everyone else but me. Making decisions that were not in my best interest.
I would get myself worked up into a frenzy when things didn't work out exactly like I planned because I expected the world to work the way I thought it should! Hey, It would be a better place for us all, if it did, right?
I thought it was entirely reasonable that everyone else should already know exactly how I thought it all should be, without me even telling them! I mean, the things that are important to me should automatically be important to everyone else! And the solutions that I thought were perfect for the situation should be the first thing that popped into everybody else's mind.
Unreasonable Without Knowing It
The consequence of all this stinking thinking was my life becoming unmanageable. I desperately needed a restoration to sanity. Well, my new Al-Anon friends mentioned something about becoming unreasonable without knowing it. Who me?
Slowly I began to recognize the difference between those things that I was doing that were setting myself up for disappointment, like having unrealistic expectations of others, that were sure to be dashed. At the same time, I never once set myself up for success. Today, at least I know not to set myself up for disaster with unrealistic expectations and I know not to try to change the things that I cannot change.
Some Expectations Are Reasonable, Some Not
~By Buddy T
I spent years trying to change someone else and years looking after everyone else but me. Making decisions that were not in my best interest.
I would get myself worked up into a frenzy when things didn't work out exactly like I planned because I expected the world to work the way I thought it should! Hey, It would be a better place for us all, if it did, right?
I thought it was entirely reasonable that everyone else should already know exactly how I thought it all should be, without me even telling them! I mean, the things that are important to me should automatically be important to everyone else! And the solutions that I thought were perfect for the situation should be the first thing that popped into everybody else's mind.
Unreasonable Without Knowing It
The consequence of all this stinking thinking was my life becoming unmanageable. I desperately needed a restoration to sanity. Well, my new Al-Anon friends mentioned something about becoming unreasonable without knowing it. Who me?
Slowly I began to recognize the difference between those things that I was doing that were setting myself up for disappointment, like having unrealistic expectations of others, that were sure to be dashed. At the same time, I never once set myself up for success. Today, at least I know not to set myself up for disaster with unrealistic expectations and I know not to try to change the things that I cannot change.
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