Spent,
Your husband sounds like my husband's twin :-).
Good for you on making a choice - it is always a hard one to make. I think this forum is a great place to vent and to figure out what you want.
I like your idea about taking him out to dinner. Maybe I will do the same. Mine's agreed to counseling, but not to recover - just to see if he can get me to accept him the way he is. My ideas are to use counseling as a way to set the limits I will accept. We'll see how it goes.
Take care and please feel free to vent as much as you like. You're in a group that understands and cares.
Hugs,
Kitkat