What an in depth letter, I hope that after you wrote that you felt some piece. Recovery is a life long process, and it is time for you to get on with your life. I am the daughter of an alcoholic mother, she has been sober 6 years. Unfortunately she has liver cirrosis and Ive just had to put her in a long term care facility. All the things you speak of I went through with my mother, she was even drunk at my baby shower. Horribly embarrassing moments and sadness with her. It sounds like you have educated yourself greatly on addiction, wich is a step to recovery. I detached from my mother and it was the hardest thing I ever did. Writing is a wonderful way to express your feelings and a healer. I now have a son who is addicted son whom I am having great difficulty detaching from. Your mother is ill, and hopefully one day she will get it and truly be ready for recovery. My heart goes out too you, but it sounds like your on the right path.Bless you