Tiger, I am so sorry you are going through all this pain... I have been there also... My hubby has taken lots of money, "borrowed" ATM card, applied and maxed out credit cards in my name... and everytime he did it... He has this big wonderful excuse of why he did... It was never drugs... it was always something else!!!! He use to make me feel as if There was something I did to deserve this kind of behavior... I also felt like the loser!!! He would disappear, not call, and I would be worried sick to my stomach too....
Tiger, Do something to protect your money.... Bills are reality and when someone is using money is no object... Right away I closed our mutual checking accounts, gave all the checks that had his name on it to the bank so they could destroy them (because when he was using he would write bad checks) and I opened my own account... I had to close all of our credit cards, and I told the companies what hubby was doing so they put a rush on deactiving my cards!!!!
There is nothing we can do to stop them from using... I have tried everything... but we can and we must protect ourselves....We cannot control it, we cannot cure it, and it's not our fault!!!!
Protect yourself Tiger!!!! and in the meantime.. do something nice for you... anything... Find a nar-anon/al-anon group... You will meet many people who are and have been there... Find some books at the library... Do anything to keep your mind off of what he is doing... and Most of all take care of you...
I will pray for you and your hubby...
Hugs to you Tiger... Love clowie