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Old 04-15-2003, 08:43 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Ogly
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Colorado
Posts: 161
Hi Sweetie!

Yes, you are desperately afraid to be alone as most of us were in the beginning when we were trying to make the decision to leave our addict..... There is nothing wrong in realizing and admitting how frightening it is to leave a life you know - even one that is absolutely horrible and stepping out into the great big unknown world.....
But if you let the fear of the unknown control you - you will be stuck in this world of pain for the rest of your natural life. How could anything in the outside world be worse that what you are in now? It can't because you were given by your higher power the gift of CHOICE!!! If you don't like something - you can CHOOSE to do something about it.... MY question to you is - what are you choosing to do right now?

I know you are conflicted - I have been there too and everyone is right - we cannot tell you you need to leave - you need to do that - and actually you already have you just don't have enough faith in yourself to just go along with your convictions..... you are afraid you are not strong enough to survive by yourself...... The chulpa bunny - with her handy dandy frying pan - is here to smack you with love and say - that is utter and complete ********!

Every person here on these boards are some of the strongest people I know....We have all managed to carve out for ourselves a life and an exsistence in a space that most people could never imagine....Now close your eyes and imagine, just imagine what you could do if you took that strength, skill and determination and put it towards making your life - again i repeat - making YOUR LIFE what you want it to be!!! (notice I did not mention anything about the addict's life.......

As with anything in our lives - it is FEAR that traps us..... Realize that and you are one step closer to the freedom that you crave - and the definition of rfreedom is what ever you make it!

Love
Ogly
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