Originally Posted by
sunny 
by the choice "or me or the bottle", cause something tells me he would rather the bottle....
You're probably right. If you give him that choice, you'll be gone. He'll choose the bottle. Not just once or twice, but every time. Over and over, he'll choose the bottle.
Get out now. Run. Run for your life.
You deserve to be with a man who loves you. Go find one.
The guy you're with right now sees you as a tool. Like a hammer, or a screwdriver. You're just a piece of equipment that he needs to accomplish a task.
That task is proving to himself and to others that he's not an alcoholic because you haven't left him yet.
He's not "special", he's not "different", and when you confront him and he goes 2 days without a drink, that doesn't meant that there's "hope".
Your life, from this day forward, will be nothing but misery if you stay with him.