Not understanding
Hello,
I've been reading all of your posts and sending happy thoughts your way!
For me Christmas went fine. Spent it by myself with my dog. All that peace and quiet made me feel well rested.
However (there always is one, isn't there?), a while back a couple who I considered to be my close friends cruelly cut me out of their lives. They started this by not answering my calls or text messages and finally Isent an email and the reply I got is messing with my head. It blundly stated that I am a bore and dead weight to them and that for a few years they have been trying to figure out how to get rid of me and said that I was just too stupid to get the message of them not answering my messages so they literally had to spell it out.
This really has me hurting bad. No one has ever ended a friendship with me like this.
All this has left me with is bunch of questions only these people who left can answer and I'm not sure I want to even hear their answers. One of my good friends did say that judging by the mail those people never really were my friends and she couldn't see the point of ending a friendship so cruely either unless you really wanted to just hurt someone.
I know some friendships fade in time and that's natural and this friendship with the person who wrote the mail was fading but since this was a couple I still had a mutual hobby I weekly went to with the other one of this couple. To read in the mail that this decision to leave me was made by both of them and that they both find me boring really hurt cos the one I went to practise with I really liked and had no idea that she felt that way.
So now I question myself...why didn't I see this coming? What did I do to deserve this? Do other people see me like these 2 did? Why was the mail written and why couldn't they end this friendship that has lasted over 14 years more kindly?
Rationally thinking I know this is not about me but about them but it's me that it' s hurting. I don't know how to get over this thing. I feel like I'm starting to obsess over this and now I'm starting to doubt all my friendships which is making all this worse.
Can you help me to get of this track, please?