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Old 12-17-2006, 03:10 PM
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Gemini31
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Aurora, Colorado
Posts: 37
Angry Are they manipulating me again?

I cut ties with my family about 5 months ago. Dad is an alcoholic, mom an enabler and emotional abuser. I have been lonely, but I have also felt healthier than I have in years without them in my life.

Now out of the blue, I am receiving e-mails from them both saying how much they want a reconciliation with me. My Dad saying, "I would celebrate a relationship with my youngest daughter again." Yea well I feel like I would have celebrated having a sober father the last 31 years.

My mother has sent me greeting cards and roses. I would have loved for her to have done this so many times in my life and she picks now? I am both sad and angry about this. Mostly angry, I admit I need to deal with my anger.

All I have ever wanted was a relationship with both of them and they instead chose their addictions, a new family (my mom re-married and moved away). Her "new" family is hardly there for her now, so I feel like now she comes running to me who she abandoned at 16. Why now?

I know a lot of people's first response to me is, "They are trying, maybe you should open your heart and give it a chance." I just can't be sure that is the case. I know my Dad is still drinking and I feel like maybe my mom just misses having someone to kick around. I don't trust either one of them, and the thought of getting back into a situation where my mother is abusive to me is terrifying. I finally got away from that.

Does anyone have any advice? I don't want to be manipulated by them anymore, but it does hurt having no family as well. I have been having nightmares about them both all week.
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