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Old 12-15-2006, 09:22 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Trying_in_Texas
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: BFE
Posts: 116
You know what's cool... you get to decide whether you want to return his call or let the voicemail take a message.

Personally, I could never completely "detach" from my addicted mother. Thankfully, I have a very close nuclear family and we collectively decided to basically back her into a corner and "force" her to go to rehab by promising to take away everything we could if she refused. She went, and she's been sober for two years.

If you don't think that rehab is ever going to be a possibility for your dad, who knows - it really might be best for you to stay away. You shouldn't feel guilty if you choose that path - he is sick, but he is refusing to help himself, and you have your own family to take care of.

I also think that there is a way to detach and still be a part of his life, if the guilt is too much. It takes a lot of time to sit down and determine what your boundaries, are, etc., so there's nothing wrong with completely cutting his negative influence out during stressful times, such as the holidays.

Maybe after New Year's, you can sit down and figure out a plan, if you really want to keep him in your and your kids' lives. You can always change your mind, too. We are allowed to do that.
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