Morning Glory

Excuses Alcoholics Make
Floyd P. Garrett, M.D.

By the time a chronic addictive process such as alcoholism has become frankly problematic it has invariably acquired a complex and sophisticated array of psychological defense mechanisms aimed at protecting its continued existence by minimizing the cognitive dissonance the addict experiences as a result of his progressively irrational self- and usually other- harmful behavior.

Though he imagines himself to be free - perhaps even freer than free!- and though he will (because he is unable to) brook no contradiction to his will, the addict is nevertheless completely controlled by and under the thumb of his addiction.

In fact his behavior is not determined by his own will at all but by the will of the addiction that now constitutes and constructs his reality. For in addiction, the true self is suppressed or eclipsed and the false self -the addicted self- installed in its place as a kind of Vichy regime to execute the imperatives of its lord and master, addiction. The addict, that is, supposes that he is making his own choices when in fact they are being made for him by his addiction. Yet obvious as this may be and frequently is to those around him, it is normally the most difficult thing of all for the addict himself to grasp or admit.

The will of the addiction is a blind biological process that is endlessly questing for gratification and satiation, regardless of the consequences to the individual himself. Though such satiation and gratification may be transiently obtained they are inherently ephemeral, indeed, self-undermining states that are quickly followed by a return of the original distress. The addict purchases an all too brief remission of his dysphoria(bad feeling) at the cost of added misery on the other side. Addiction is thus a kind of Faustian Bargain.

Addiction also resembles the fabled perpetual motion machine that runs of itself - while the plight of the individual addict is precisely that of the unfortunate soul who holds a wolf by its ears. In such a predicament both holding on and letting go seem equally undesirable - even calamitous.

Because addiction is a stereotyped and fundamentally inhuman process it produces predictable signs and symptoms that may be used to gauge the degree of its progress as it penetrates and invades the personality of the individual afflicted by it. One set of symptoms of addiction are the customary excuses the addict makes to himself and others for the irregularities of thinking and behavior foisted upon him and those around him by his addiction.

Common stereotyped addictive defenses include but are by no means limited to the following:



Problem? What problem?
Primitive and unconscious denial is classified as a psychotic defense mechanism because it denies or distorts reality itself. Those in the grip of psychotic denial are literally out of touch with reality. Thus an alcoholic with multiple and perfectly obvious negative consequences from his pathological drinking(legal, health, marital and job problems) may, difficult as this is to believe, indignantly and -from his perspective- honestly deny that he has a serious problem with alcohol. He doesn't know what people who criticize his drinking are talking about - and he is genuinely hurt and offended at what he perceives to be their unfair and unreasonable attacks upon him. He often reacts to expressions of concern about his drinking with self-pity, resentment, and -of course- more drinking.

I'm not THAT bad!
Minimization and downplaying of the problems connected with addiction fill in the gaps and take up the slack left by the failure of psychotic denial to adjust reality completely to the requirements of the addiction. The addict admits that difficulties exist - but he stoutly maintains, frequently in the face of an astonishing and rapidly accumulating mountain of evidence to the contrary, that they are not really as bad as others make them out to be.

It wasn't my fault or It's not the way it looks!
Rationalization and projection of blame attempt to distance the addict from the consequences of his(actually, of his addiction's) actions. Alternative explanations are constructed and stoutly defended, e.g. the employer who fired him or the officer who arrested him or the wife who divorced him were actuated by dishonest or frankly corrupt motives.

All I want is a little relief!
Justification of addictive behavior is often self-pitying and subtly manipulative. The addict feels victimized, perhaps even martyred by what he believes to be the unfair circumstances of his existence and seeks consolation from his addiction. He believes himself thereby an exception and entitled to special treatment, including remission or at least mitigation of the sins caused by his addictive behavior. The prospect of giving up his addiction or, even worse, having it taken away from him by the unsympathetic demands and requirements of others fills him with horror and indignation. Blind to the fact that it is his addiction and its consequences that are making him miserable, he falsely believes that the addiction is the only source of comfort and security available to him in a cruel, cruel world.

I'm not hurting anybody but myself!
Frequently phrased as "Leave me alone! I'm not hurting anybody but myself!" this defense invokes a legalistic right to self-harm at the same time as it denies the interpersonal and social realities of the addict's harmful behaviors. The addict, unable or unwilling to recognize how his behavior does in fact impact and thus harm other people, indignantly and self-righteously proclaims "It's MY life and I can do anything I please with it!" Curiously -and revealingly- the addict seldom finds anything incongruous in the notion that he might knowingly and willingly be harming himself, regardless of whether he is harming anyone else.

Nobody knows the trouble I've seen!
A blatant claim for special status based upon self-pity. Because it is seldom as persuasive to others as it is to the addict himself - other people usually have difficulty seeing how one's problems, no matter how severe or unfair, justify adding further misery resulting from theoretically avoidable addictive behaviors- the frustrated addict usually becomes resentful and sullen, convinced that "nobody really understands me." This licenses, at least in the addict's mind, still more flagrant and egregious addictive acting up and out.

I've got to be me! or You knew this when you married me!
Unable to distinguish himself from his addiction, the addict cannot imagine himself or existence without the addiction. The prospect of "losing" the addiction is unthinkable to him since it would, he believes, mean the loss of himself and of everything that makes life worth living. The addict paints a Romantic portrait for himself and others which, while it may acknowledge at least some of the destructive effects of his addiction, attempts to rationalize the insanity of addictive behavior as glorious, if tragic self-actualization and fulfillment, and to represent anything less than this, e.g. abstinence and sobriety, as a kind of forfeiture of the self and living death, to which a premature addictive exitus is much to be preferred. The fact that many addicts actually believe such transparent foolishness is a somber testimony to the power of addictive insanity.