I've had two marriages with two different outcomes. Marriage #1 was not to an A but to someone who had to have pot daily. Basically it was a loveless marriage, more like roommates but produced my daughter. After the initial animosity from the divorce and custody issues we have been able to become friendly. I am actually friendly with my "wife-in-law" and was one of the first people to go hold their baby when he was born. We can all sit together at school functions, funerals or whatever. When our daughter spent a week in ICU at Texas Children's last year we both stayed up there round the clock, shared a room at Ronald McDonald house (sleeping in shifts - certainly not at the same time LOL!) We made the commitment when we got pregnant that no matter what we would put her needs and wishes first and do what we could to ensure her happiness. We stuck by that and she will be the first to tell you how lucky she feels.
Now to ex-AH (hubby #2). Raging alcoholic. Tried twice to make it work. Have no need nor desire to contact him about anything. He is insane enough that if I tried to be friendly he would take it as more.
Hope that helps answer your question!
Kellye