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Old 12-11-2006, 08:43 PM
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DesertEyes
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Hello there mazey,

I still talk to my ex-wife. Mostly about financial stuff that's still not finished, sometimes about Mom, sometimes about the kids. Mom is 93yrs old, and is technically her step mother but I keep in touch with her cuz she's adorable. The "kids" is technically my ex-wife's 39yr old daughter, but we got really close while I was her step-dad. There's also the 4 grandkids that we talk about from time to time.

"Friends" is not something I'm comfortable with. The last few years of our marriage she was very clearly un-friendly in her behavior. One of the reasons we separated was her asking me to participate in the cover-up of her affairs with married men. I could not lie to the wives and my ex-wife didn't care for that. As long as she continues to use and abuse other people's marriages I don't want to be associated with her.

I've heard of other people who are able to "patch up" their relationship after a divorce. One couple I know back in L.A. has been married and divorced _five_ times. To each other.

To me a friendship requires _trust_, and I don't have that with my ex. If she can't be trusted to respect somebody else's marriage I sure am not going to trust her with much else. If she were to someday seek recovery and get her "feces amalgamated" that would be wonderful for her, and I might consider getting to know the new woman she might become. But I'm not going to put my life on hold waiting for the "what ifs". I did that while married to her, no sense in doing that again now that we are divorced. To me that would be a "codie relapse".

Mike
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