IndigoNA

I'm sick and tired of my sponsor. But I don't know if it's really that I should be pissed off or if it's just an ego trip of mine not wanting to do "as he says"

Well anyways. He told me to call these guys who are getting in recovery so we could ALL meet tonight before a meeting. First point do I have to be calling them or does he have to do it? He's always like: do this, do that, call the hotel and book a room, blah blah.

So I called the guys and setup to meet. I called him left him a voicemail. He left me a voicemail saying that he did his 12 step work for the week so he won't be able to meet with us, and I'm supposed to guide the kids through the steps, something that I have never done and don't know where to start.

He says he's my "friend". At first I thought he was. But I think friends call each other to hang out, plus he knows I'm new and I have difficulty making friends. So he never calls. So I said. F*ck it then, I won't even count on him for plans. He does stuff with other AA people and never includes me. So I really don't care about that anymore, then I just started to be cold with him as he is with me. Not trying to please him, or do anything to be accepted, which I think it's fair for me to do.

The other day I was having lunch, he gets close to me. I'm eating, OK, and I'm not being friendly as I used to be, why the heck should I be? I'm just being polite, saying hi, etc. So I'm eating but I don't pay much attention to him. He then says something like "well if you don't want me to be around you then I will leave". Then I say pissed off something like this "HEY, I haven't said anything".

I really don't know if I'm f*cking up, or he's not right for me as a sponsor. I'd like to hear your thoughts.

F*ck, I'm starting to hate these AA Nazis and their cliques within AA.