Tennlady welcome to SR.
You obviously realize you have a problem and since we ARE NOT DOCTORS I would strongly suggest with the amount of pills you are taking, that you contact an ADDICTION SPECIALIST who in all liklihood will help you to get into a medical detox facility.
You are definitely endangering your life!
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing, but please, please, find a way to get into a Medical Detox.
Love and hugs,