I am going into denial again..
I went to an AA meeting last night. It was o.k. I should of arrived alot earlier because I didn't meet too many people and the lady I did meet seemed in a rush. The speaker was good and I could relate to some of the stuff he said.
I am worried because I know that my mind is playing tricks on me. In the past, I always fell off the wagon after a month or so. I find myself thinking.. ugghh!! It wasn't so bad, I am not an every day drinker, I could control my booze alot of the time blah! blah! blah!.. Maybe I am just a problem drinker etc...
I know were I am headed, I don't know how to change my thought process. I almost wish I was an everyday drinker (not really but you know what I mean) so I would have an easier time staying convinced that I am an alcoholic. You know, I am still not convinced that I am an alcoholic. I am just being brutally honest because it is the only way that I can stay sober.
I am bitchy and edgy.
Joanne