Glad you are getting so many replies, Cynay... because I am at a loss.
Is your daughter using? If so, her behavior fits with my experience, and if so, then I would start worrying about yourself and not her well-being.
If not, then I am confused. I suppose your behavior would have to be the same... a gentle distance that "waits" for her to come to you. But right now, she sounds like a stubborn brat (and I say that with love, I have 2 of my own!) and that "waiting" may take a while.
While "waiting" I have to turn the bright light OFF of my kids. That is hard... and contrary to everything I ever learned as a mom. Hell, I grew those "eyes in the back of my head" for a danged good reason! But turning away and focusing on myself and the rest of my life makes me a better mom... in the long run.
(((hugs)))