As ever Don, fascinating stuff. Whenever I read a lot of your posts,it reminds me how bereft of so many of these skills - or should I say, unaware of so many of these short-comings? - I was, before I went into recovery. And in turn, how consistent it is to suggest that we treat the whole condition of alcoholism - which of course has so many of the attributes you identify here and elsewhere - perhaps writ large? I don't know - in an attempt to reduce the chances of relapse. But the more contemprary work has so much more detail to it. And I have to inlcude in that some of the Rational Recovery stuff, which does of course bring out the prejudiced part of me!
Only bit I would throw a qualification into here is the bit about asserting yourself in those various circumstances, including difference of opinion. I think what is essential is rather knowing that one has the capacity to assert, whether one chooses to use it or not. The feeling of impotent powerlessness in those situations is a terrible source of resentment and negativity. But the opposite is not necessarily to explicitly assert, but to know wholheartedly that one could.
Not nitpicking, just a first impression. Off to a museum with the kids - like libraries, our secular temples!