View Single Post
Old 08-14-2006, 12:51 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Don S
Member
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Northern CA
Posts: 1,432
Any behavior can become compulsive. The question is whether the behavior is becoming harmful to you, to your family or relationships, to your work performance. Do you harbor unrealistic beliefs about the value of online chatting? Do you feel that you could not sustain your sobriety without it? There are clear ways to assess whether your beliefs are rational, healthy, or help you reach your goals.

More important to me is that your wife is uncomfortable with what you are doing because she doesn't know what you are doing. There is a common perception among folks who don't go online much that these relationships aren't 'real' because they aren't face-to-face. Most of us find real benefits in being able to choose our level of anonymity here. But the things she is describing certainly do happen. How open are you with her about what you're doing? Has she ever visited these forums, or watched you chat online at SMART Recovery? Is it infringing on time you used to spend together? Would you be uncomfortable if she sat down at your computer and logged on to the sites you visit regularly?
That's probably enough questions for now....Take care,
Don S is offline