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Old 08-12-2006, 08:41 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
if@firstudont36
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Reading,OH
Posts: 1
Alternatives to Al Anon

I am sober and working through things now. I have had a friend who went from drinking and smoking pot to using crack cocaine. We drank together and we both knew we had a serious problem with alcohol. We both were in and out of AA. Once he got into crack he fell down so fast I lost him. If he's still alive I'd say he's in prison and he is not a "hard" person. I had no words to console his mother with. So I have seen this thing from both sides and my friend is only one person that I've lost. I think first off is to take a breath and realize that whatever has transpired you are a human being. We have limits on how much we can deal with before things get haywire. Finding an understanding and supportive therapist is a good first start. Even with an actively using person. I think this is important if at all possible. It may not be possible to afford this due to suffering finances from having an addict in the household. A support group of some kind even if it doesn't directly address your "addict" problem, getting emotional support is a good place to start. You'll need a lot of emotional support to begin to get some of your sanity and sense of "self" back. As difficult as it is for me to do the things I need to do I know that for my mother and others that have cared about me it is even hard to get your self worth back. Everything is distorted. I go to SMART which deals with many forms of behavior not just with susbstance addiction but other mal adjusted behaviors. Gambling,sex,spending, and overeating to depression help. It deals with things through what is called cognitive therapy. It sounds more technical than it is. It can work to support your dealing with another individual. Also there is a organization called NAMI. It offers support for those who have loved ones that are mentally ill. I can understand that after years of neglect and horrible mistreatment from the user you have grown to dispise this person. This doesn't make you a bad person for feeling this way and to me seems healthy to have a lot of anger. You didn't ask for this and certainly don't deserve it.
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