Originally Posted by equus
My favourite Guide is my Sri Lankan taxi driver friend who said strong words are when the heart and mouth speak the same language, not two like a politician!! He reckoned if you can learn to mean what you say - which includes knowing what your words mean, then you can offer something by talking. It's a hard task, I had no idea how hard but it is interesting and it makes sense!
There is a saying attributed to Ghandi:
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - It is truly great!!
I agree with all the things you said about feelings, chemicals, physiology of the body etc. Equus. When I think about my own martyrdom, it was not essentially doing anyone any good, least of all me. When we are sacrificing ourselves I think that is a completely different thing to doing something good for someone else because we want to, because it has the potential to bring us just as much joy as the other person. If I do something for someone I have to make sure that I am doing it without hurting myself in the process and that I am just sharing myself honestly. I also believe now that I essentially must get something in the exchange to keep it a true, equal and balanced exchange between people. What that is may be a fantastic feeling of well being. I certainly have gotten no feeling of well being from sacrificing my intrinsic self and worth for someone else, that was just plain bad for me and that is what I have done in the mistaken belief that it would bring me joy.
I haven't read the books you mention aloneagainor, I have found within my own belief system some truisms within the catholic faith and also some very good psychological strategies for living - always thought that confession was a great way to offload in a safe way and do some penance so that we could grow, change and evolve. Absolutely love the teaching to treat others as we would like to be treated. But I have definitely also found that catholicism has a controlling element. Organised religion is a bit like that in my opinion, based on social requirements as much as an ideology.
I also think that catholicism has been based on a male dominated ideology, it exhibits fear of women and of natural sex. I doubt that is healthy nor natural - there have been many extremely disconcerting accounts of sexual depravation within the catholic faith and priesthood, quite revolting. Even as a child I didn't see it as natural to have priests and nuns on their own.
I remember as a child being told that a nun that was my teacher was about to be married to god - she was finalising her vows - I cried because I thought that meant she would have to be killed to do that and I so loved this teacher. Weird stuff really. Religion is a man made construct IMO and I can take or leave certain things - some of it is great and really powerful, other stuff is just the teachings of really inhibited and power trip hungry individuals. There is definitely a controlling element in most social constructs.
peace and love,
Brigid
