A Return to Normalcy

[Rowan]

Hi Ladies
With the advent of the first day of school upon us, it's time to get back into the groove. I haven't been able to visit the board as much since I've been on
time off and my home PC hasn't been working well.
I have 1 year of sobriety, today, and I am so pleased, and so grateful. My life has changed so much, and I cannot believe the opportunities that continue to appear in my life.
Now, I have a question. I have been asked to speak, for the very first time, this coming Sunday at an open meeting where there will be approximately 300 persons in attendance. Am I scared? What do you think???
Seriously, though, I am honoured to have the privilege to share my ESH but .. I was wondering if anyone had any advice to help me through this? I tried rehearsing what I would say but it wasn't coming naturally - my sponsor says this is a sign from my HP that I shouldn't rehearse, and that I need to remember to share from the heart. I don't have a problem with this, I'm just .. still .. somewhat frightened of other's judgements of me. I get caught up in saying the 'right' thing, carrying the 'right' message, rather than sharing 'my' experience. Any feedback? Thanks.

Love Rowan

[bubblze30]

Once you get up there the words will flow so freely that you will not believe it see life is not rehersed it is lived and you have lived a clean life for three hundred sixty five days and counting you will be fine up there. If you are scared try to focus on one person that sometimes help. If you go with a friend have them sit in the middle of everything that way you can focus on him/her and I just know you will be great. I was scared to death to speak afraid of getting toungue tied and everything well I got up there and I just started talking about how I got to where I am and what I plan to do to keep it. Good luck and God speed keep faith in your higher power he will guide you all the way.

[ButterflyChaser]

Yippppeee! i am so excited for you girl!!!!! :friday: <---I'm cheering you on with a drink of pepsi (or mountain dew, what I like, lol)
My opion, and I've never done that before except when i was in rehab years ago, is to just get up there & DO IT! As for me, i'd have stage fright! lol
Good Luck to you, I know you can do this!! You Go Girl!!!!

[Paulie]

WooHoo 1 year congrats to you. That is awesome!!!!

300 people, Holy Smokes!! we don't have meetings that big where I live. Listen to your HP, I agree with your sponsor don't rehearse. Whenever I speak at a meeting I always end up saying everything different than I thought i would anyway.

Share with the a little about how you got to the program, then share with them what keeps you there. Share with the newcomer what it feels like to have a year clean. My favorite shares are the one that share hope and joy, that tell me the gifts that people have gotten since they got clean.

Good luck to you, you will do GREAT.
And again, be proud of yourself for 1 year, that is awesome.

[wastedtime4me]

{{{{{{{{{{rowan}}}}}}}}}}}}}
congrats and best of luck...
remeber the old saying....just picture everyone in their undiess..lmao

[KelKel]

(((Rowan)))
Maybe make a few cue cards with leads to get you started... in case your mind freezes up, I think that you will find that once you get started your HP will just lead you along and you will not even notice the crowd.

I love big meetings like that, I miss them.....

[namommy]

Rowan,

Congrats on 1 year!!

Before I speak, I ALWAYS pray first. I ask God to remove such defects as ego, arrogance, and self-righteousness, and I ask him to use me a vehicle. Please allow me to deliver a clear message of recovery in Narcotics Anonymous. It works everytime. I find that if I ask him to take me out of the way, I am able to focus on an honest message without worrying about what people think. I'm not here to please anyone, I am here because I don't want to die today. Just take a deep breath, shoot up a prayer or 2 or 3..., and be honest that is the best message anyone can give.

Good luck, you'll do fine.

[Rowan]

Ladies
Thank you for your kindness and thank you for your wisdom.
The fear is less prevalent today - I'm feeling something akin to acceptance.
Sometimes when I think of being up there, it's like I'm in a freefall .. jump from
the plane and have faith that the parachute will open. Time to let go of the
controls and let God take over.
Love to all. Rowan