Is your partner a alcoholic also?

[vla]

HI I'm Kim and I am a alcoholic
How do you cope when the daily drinking starts? Hubby cracks a beer as soon as he walks in the door after dinner he changes over to my addiction vodka.

[51anna]

Hi Kim,

No, my husband never had a drinking problem and stopped drinking when I did to be supportive. I know it must be hard to cope with drinking in your home, but it's something you have to accept. You cannot change your husband. Just try to focus on your goal and keep busy doing other things. Maybe you could be in a different room from your husband when he is drinking. I know it'll make the situation difficult, but you can handle it.

Love, Anna

[bubblze30]

Hi my ex parter was to addicted. I chose recovery he chose not. Howeva we did not make it together. It is possible. I have seen some that work and some that dont. He may not be ready yet and viseversa. All you can do is work on yourself. If he has a regular routine make plans to goto a meeting after you cook dinner. If he loves you he will understand that you can not be around him while he is drinking. make plans weather a walk a meeting a trip toi the store until you are stronger. Who knows he may follow you and stop too. Hang in there I will pray for you and your family.

[Lompocian]

Hi, Kim,

My name is Carol and I'm an alcoholic/addict and ditto for my husband. I'm new here to the board so I'm not sure how long you've been sober.

There were many times when I tried to get sober when my husband wasn't ready himself... and during those times when he would pop open a beer, I would cringe at the sound of that can opening....and at the same time big time feelings of resentments would kick in...

Now I'm going to fast-foward the tape to 1999.......I had left my husband a few months prior and we had just reconciled after his getting out of another rehab, continuing with aftercare and becoming a member of AA once again...

During dinner with some other people he had gone to rehab with, I had the pleasure of sitting next to one of the other wives who was not in the program and had order a cocktail. Those old feelings of resentments surfaced once again....I was probably only 4 and 5 months sober and then a few days later I realized.... she wasn't the one with the drinking problem, I was.

I know that's not a solution for you but just think about it. I would have to admit it would be hard having my spouse drinking in front of me. Today, I don't have a problem or any resentment towards someone who drinks in front of me. Have you shared with your husband how this affects you?

Best of Luck to You

[shelly75]

When i was with daughters dad and first tried to quit he actually offered me booze to him alcoholism is a myth and does not exist I just had to learn control. any ways I left and am now with a recovering alcoholic (hes got 13 yrs I got almost 2yrs) in the start even though i understood i was the one with problem I could not handle seeing people drinking but that only lasted a couple for a couple of months. I still will not sit with some one who is actively having a beer but thats due to the smell.oh yeah im shelly and im an alcoholic sober almost 2 years

[51anna]

Kim,

Welcome to SR. It's good to have you onboard. We're a good group of friends here and offer each a lot of support and understanding.

Love, Anna

[daybyday]

my dh is also an alcoholic. We have gone back and forth over the years, each of us wanting to quit. We are very close and best friends. I find the only way to do it (for me) is together. Otherwise it is too hard being around it and watching someone you love abuse themselves. We are doing it together now.