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wakowife · 11-23-2003, 04:44 PM

hi to everyone, haven't been able to get on that much lately, for some crazy reason my computer keeps going down and they i keep getting a pop up that tells me i cant post to this site, i haveno clue what is going on.

it's been a really really bad week for me this past week, that girl that was giving my son so many problems showed up at his job with 12 guys last saturday just as he would have been getting off of work, he was smart enought to inform the manager what was going on and the manager told them to all leave the storm, somhow she got hold of his new cell # and her new boy friend (#4) since breaking up with my so n. keeps calling him and threateining,. well just as i was walking out to go to school wednesday we get a call from a friend of his that he was in the park and he was being locked up. we go fltyin g to the park and i'm screaming even before i knew what had happened. well it turns oiut he was in the wrong place at the wrong time, he cuts thru the park to go to his girlfriends house, he stops to say hello to a few kids he knows and out of no where come the cops, the were making a drug sweep in the park, he got busted for having brass knuckles, he said with all the threats that he as been getting he felt like he need protection, i had to get in toudch with a friend of mine who is a det, he had mo son out of the statyion house within 45 min witha summons, but the summons says that he was busted for marijuana, because that is only a fine and if they would have put down it was brass knuckles it's a felony in the2nd degree. natually he is being punished and not allowed out of the house except for school and work. just the following night my hubby askes me to go to work with him to just hang out and get away from the some of the stress.

did you ever get the feeling that something just isnt right, well i'm not gone an hour and i come home, my daughter tells me my son is downstairs in his room taking a shower, but my upstairs neighbor tells me that my son left 3 minutes earlier, we go down stairs to find the shower water running but my son is no where around. just as we get back outside he's comong up the block and sees us, he tries to run but cant get away,he had the nerve to break his punishment because he needed cigarettes, we didn't even know that he was smoking.

so for all you parents out there that think you really know your kids, take some advice from me and never let your guard down.
i did and i didn't know what was going on right under my nose.

sorry tog go on like this, just needed to get some of this off my chest, i dont want my family or close friends to know that he got into trouble.

Bernadette

**51anna** · 11-23-2003, 05:23 PM

It has been a tough week for you Bernadette. And, you're right - when you have kids you have to be vigilant all day, every day. You always have to be paying attention to what they're doing and who they're with. The good thing is, it pays off in the end!

Hugs and love,
Anna

dotcom · 11-23-2003, 06:04 PM

hi wakowife

im sorry your having a bad week. sometimes i just cant wait for the week to be over. i hope things start improving with your son. i know i gave my parents a real hard time. im 19 now so it wasnt that long ago. my mom gets down on herself sometimes, saying she shouldnt have let me go and do certain things...but i lied to her about it and told her i know she did the best she could. there was a long period of time when id have my mom drop me off on a street corner to meet my bf who was homeless. only id tell her i was going to the taco shop to meet a friend for some tacos. so dont get down on yourself. thankfully THIS TOO SHALL PASS. i know my moms thrilled that all that stuff is over.

GOD BLESS
dotcom

2stop · 11-23-2003, 06:21 PM

(((((((Bernadette))))))))
Bless your heart girl! I am sending (((Hugs))) and (((Prayers))) your way. Get some rest my friend, this has to be so tiring.

(((((((((((More Hugs))))))))))))):redrose

zoomer · 11-23-2003, 06:22 PM

(((((((Bern))))))))))))),Teens!!!!!!!!! Ugh!!! I have one son who makes good grades,but is always in trouble. It's hard for me not to step in,but he just has to learn the law is the law. My other son will be 18 very soon and I remind him a lot that he will be held responcible for everything he does now. I guess too we as parents have to realize our kids lie all the time. Not much you can do about that. Push all the trouble back onto your son and tell him your not involved any more. Go do something nice for yourself and know you did your best.

SkyIsFalling42 · 11-23-2003, 10:51 PM

(((Bernadette)))
Sending you hugs of compassion as a mother of three. Oh the teenage years three different times with tree different children!!

It is truly a hard thing. We can only do our best with our children. I kind of look at this is this way: If you are showing someone how to tend a garden, you make sure that they have a hoe and rake, fertilizer and the knowlege of how to use these things. Same with our children. What they see us do, and what we teach them are their tools. Life is their garden. It is inevitably up to them as to how they will use the tools that they have been given. We cannot tend their garden with their tools, or with our tool either, they have to tend to their own gardens. And if we do try to tend their garden with our tools, our gardens become overgrown with weeds, which threaten to stangle the growing.
And my sister, please dont even go there!! No guilt!! I truly do feel that when kids are able to see committment and change and spirituality involved in recovery, it is very good for them in many ways. These too are tools. Very good ones which can be used in any area of life.

Paulie · 11-24-2003, 09:34 AM

Bernedette -

Sounds like things I did to my mom. Left the shower running - gotta give him credit for thinking!!! LOL

I am sorry that he still seems to be in danger from those other kids, I hope he sees the lesson in it soon.

wakowife · 11-24-2003, 02:06 PM

Paulie: i have to admit i think the shower thing was actually funny, i know i wuoldn't have thougght of leaving the water running, i

wakowife · 11-24-2003, 02:09 PM

thanks to all of you for your kind words and caring prayers, sometimes i forget how rough it is to be a teenager, i not at all happy about him carrying those brass knuckles, but as he puts it, it was better to be picked up for carrying them, rather than him lyeing on the ground with 10 guys on top of him.
i finally found out who the boys parents are and i went stright to them, and they have promised to keep there kid under control. but as someone wrote our children dont always tell us the truth as to where they are going or who they are going with.

thanks for all your support

Bernadette

2stop · 11-24-2003, 05:10 PM

{{{Bernadette}}}

Thinking of you.......:redrose

((((((((((Hugs)))))))))

11-23-2003, 04:44 PM	#1 (permalink)
wakowife Member Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Ozone Park, New York Posts: 281	back again hi to everyone, haven't been able to get on that much lately, for some crazy reason my computer keeps going down and they i keep getting a pop up that tells me i cant post to this site, i haveno clue what is going on. it's been a really really bad week for me this past week, that girl that was giving my son so many problems showed up at his job with 12 guys last saturday just as he would have been getting off of work, he was smart enought to inform the manager what was going on and the manager told them to all leave the storm, somhow she got hold of his new cell # and her new boy friend (#4) since breaking up with my so n. keeps calling him and threateining,. well just as i was walking out to go to school wednesday we get a call from a friend of his that he was in the park and he was being locked up. we go fltyin g to the park and i'm screaming even before i knew what had happened. well it turns oiut he was in the wrong place at the wrong time, he cuts thru the park to go to his girlfriends house, he stops to say hello to a few kids he knows and out of no where come the cops, the were making a drug sweep in the park, he got busted for having brass knuckles, he said with all the threats that he as been getting he felt like he need protection, i had to get in toudch with a friend of mine who is a det, he had mo son out of the statyion house within 45 min witha summons, but the summons says that he was busted for marijuana, because that is only a fine and if they would have put down it was brass knuckles it's a felony in the2nd degree. natually he is being punished and not allowed out of the house except for school and work. just the following night my hubby askes me to go to work with him to just hang out and get away from the some of the stress. did you ever get the feeling that something just isnt right, well i'm not gone an hour and i come home, my daughter tells me my son is downstairs in his room taking a shower, but my upstairs neighbor tells me that my son left 3 minutes earlier, we go down stairs to find the shower water running but my son is no where around. just as we get back outside he's comong up the block and sees us, he tries to run but cant get away,he had the nerve to break his punishment because he needed cigarettes, we didn't even know that he was smoking. so for all you parents out there that think you really know your kids, take some advice from me and never let your guard down. i did and i didn't know what was going on right under my nose. sorry tog go on like this, just needed to get some of this off my chest, i dont want my family or close friends to know that he got into trouble. Bernadette

11-23-2003, 06:04 PM	#3 (permalink)
dotcom Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: laughing at my avatar Posts: 1,645	hi wakowife im sorry your having a bad week. sometimes i just cant wait for the week to be over. i hope things start improving with your son. i know i gave my parents a real hard time. im 19 now so it wasnt that long ago. my mom gets down on herself sometimes, saying she shouldnt have let me go and do certain things...but i lied to her about it and told her i know she did the best she could. there was a long period of time when id have my mom drop me off on a street corner to meet my bf who was homeless. only id tell her i was going to the taco shop to meet a friend for some tacos. so dont get down on yourself. thankfully THIS TOO SHALL PASS. i know my moms thrilled that all that stuff is over. GOD BLESS dotcom __________________ probably not.

11-23-2003, 06:21 PM	#4 (permalink)
2stop ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't.... Posts: 4,666	(((((((Bernadette)))))))) Bless your heart girl! I am sending (((Hugs))) and (((Prayers))) your way. Get some rest my friend, this has to be so tiring. (((((((((((More Hugs))))))))))))):redrose __________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~

11-23-2003, 10:51 PM	#6 (permalink)
SkyIsFalling42 Big kitty nose hugs Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World Posts: 1,261	(((Bernadette))) Sending you hugs of compassion as a mother of three. Oh the teenage years three different times with tree different children!! It is truly a hard thing. We can only do our best with our children. I kind of look at this is this way: If you are showing someone how to tend a garden, you make sure that they have a hoe and rake, fertilizer and the knowlege of how to use these things. Same with our children. What they see us do, and what we teach them are their tools. Life is their garden. It is inevitably up to them as to how they will use the tools that they have been given. We cannot tend their garden with their tools, or with our tool either, they have to tend to their own gardens. And if we do try to tend their garden with our tools, our gardens become overgrown with weeds, which threaten to stangle the growing. And my sister, please dont even go there!! No guilt!! I truly do feel that when kids are able to see committment and change and spirituality involved in recovery, it is very good for them in many ways. These too are tools. Very good ones which can be used in any area of life. __________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~

11-24-2003, 09:34 AM	#7 (permalink)
Paulie It is what it is!!! Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Sobriety Posts: 5,518	Bernedette - Sounds like things I did to my mom. Left the shower running - gotta give him credit for thinking!!! LOL I am sorry that he still seems to be in danger from those other kids, I hope he sees the lesson in it soon. __________________ I know more about how to live than I did yesterday, but not as much as I'll know tomorrow. Today, Ill learn something new~JFT, 1/27/06 The difference between a good day and a bad day, is about 2 days~Ann of SR

11-23-2003, 05:23 PM	#2 (permalink)
51anna Forum Leader Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Dancing in the Light Posts: 11,026	It has been a tough week for you Bernadette. And, you're right - when you have kids you have to be vigilant all day, every day. You always have to be paying attention to what they're doing and who they're with. The good thing is, it pays off in the end! Hugs and love, Anna

11-23-2003, 06:22 PM	#5 (permalink)
zoomer Gold Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: It's raining again! Posts: 2,353	(((((((Bern))))))))))))),Teens!!!!!!!!! Ugh!!! I have one son who makes good grades,but is always in trouble. It's hard for me not to step in,but he just has to learn the law is the law. My other son will be 18 very soon and I remind him a lot that he will be held responcible for everything he does now. I guess too we as parents have to realize our kids lie all the time. Not much you can do about that. Push all the trouble back onto your son and tell him your not involved any more. Go do something nice for yourself and know you did your best.

11-24-2003, 02:06 PM	#8 (permalink)
wakowife Member Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Ozone Park, New York Posts: 281	Paulie: i have to admit i think the shower thing was actually funny, i know i wuoldn't have thougght of leaving the water running, i

11-24-2003, 02:09 PM	#9 (permalink)
wakowife Member Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Ozone Park, New York Posts: 281	thanks to all of you for your kind words and caring prayers, sometimes i forget how rough it is to be a teenager, i not at all happy about him carrying those brass knuckles, but as he puts it, it was better to be picked up for carrying them, rather than him lyeing on the ground with 10 guys on top of him. i finally found out who the boys parents are and i went stright to them, and they have promised to keep there kid under control. but as someone wrote our children dont always tell us the truth as to where they are going or who they are going with. thanks for all your support Bernadette

11-24-2003, 05:10 PM	#10 (permalink)
2stop ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't.... Posts: 4,666	{{{Bernadette}}} Thinking of you.......:redrose ((((((((((Hugs))))))))) __________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~

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