Will You Be My Sponsor?

[SlvrMag]

I have 47 days clean from meth. I have been to meetings almost every day in my area and have been "Sponsor Shopping" but have not really found anyone. I would really like to start working my program and my steps, but not sure if I can or should without a sponsor.

So my question is: Is it advisable to have an 'online' sponsor, someone with whom I can call AND 'see' online? Or should I "know" my sponsor?

If an online sponsor is acceptable, is anyone interested? I feel like this is a really stupid thing to ask but oh well, I guess!

[SlvrMag]

Bump....

[Spiritual Seeker]

In my opinion a face to face sponsor from your area would be the best.
After going to a lot of mtgs. is there one you like best to be your home mtg.?
If so, ask for a sponsor there.

Way to go to kick the nasty meth addiction. Do whatever it takes to stay clean.
Best wishes in your recovery effort.

[51anna]

Hi,

I'm not an AA/NA person but I am glad that you are seeking recovery.

SR is always a good place to visit if you want to be inspired.

[ananda]

There are people who sponsor on line, but I would recommend checking out your oportunities locally first. Perhaps you could say what kind of problems you might be having with choosing from you area. Maybe we could provide ES&H to you about it.

This time sober I first got a sponsor that was recommended by others....didn't really fit very well....so I chose a woman based on the fact that she was happy and friendly! She has sponsored me for 6 months and it is going great....She is 20 years younger than me with kids and husband. I am 20 years older not married in 30 years, with a grown son....none of that matters. She has guided me through the steps, helped me to find others who share my experiences if she has none in that area, and has become a good friend.

You can always change sponsors if your first choice doesn't seem right...or get a temp sponsor to start with to help you figure out who to ask. Read the pamflet on sponsorship to help you out (from AA, available on line as well).

Hope these ideas are helpful to you! Let us know.

[dancinggirl]

God...I'm sooo in your shoes right now! My town has very few women who attend meetings and the ones I've spoken to do not have the time to take me on. Men will NOT sponsor in this town if you're a woman. I would love to have someone I can call...someone who is as interested in my recovery as I am...someone who can explain things to me in a different way, as "my" take on things was obviously screwed up!

Being sposor-less sucks.

[cmhcali]

I think I need a face to face sponsor. If not where I am so afraid of confrontation and have avoidance issues. I would never contact my online sponsor. It was so hard to talk to my sponsor for 25 minutes yesterday.

I do not know what to talk about. But that is how I am with everyone. Always feel akward. So it really is what you need and what WILL work for you.

[Lily]

SilverMag,

Way to go with kicking the meth. I quit it in 1991 after a 4 yr addiction and I am very well aware it is HARD! If i were you, I would order the workbook from NA "The narcotics anonymous step working guide and maybe get started on your first step. Keep looking and keep praying too! i would ask someone to be my temp sponsor too. you can always change if it does not work.

blessings, Sheila

[FullofIt1028]

Wow - I've been told meth is the hardest thing to kick. That's amazing! Good for you!
So you are almost at 60 days! Sweet!
I have a sponsor right now but am considering changing. If you go to meetings that often, have you connected with anyone yet? I do think it helps to have a guide for your recovery.
Someone suggested the Workbook - that's what I am doing now. I am on my first step. How It Works and Why Workbook will help you a lot.
Good luck with finding a sponsor - I'm sure you will soon.
mellie
Clean date -06/21/2008

[SlvrMag]

I go to meetings about 3-4 times a week. Still no sponsor yet. I'm looking though! Thanks for your replies!!

[kj3880]

Me too Slvrmag, I have about 4 mos clean and still no sponsor. I tried one that wasn't good at all, fired her after she violated a confidence. I have completed steps one and two, and am almost through working with three. I have been sharing some of my stepwork with a much younger girl, 20, where I am in my 40s. It isn't an ideal situation, but it seems to work for now. I couldn't wait to start step-work. If you can't find a sponsor right now, then maybe just find someone to go out to eat with once a week who is willing to at least do some step work with you. That's what I did.
KJ

[Sugah]

I did e-mail/telephone sponsorship with one person, and though she's almost three years sober now, it's difficult. We stalled out on the fifth step. I've heard fifth steps that took only an hour or two, and I've spent twelve straight hours hearing them. (Once, we met three evenings in a row to get through it.) I couldn't find a way to her and circumstances wouldn't permit her to come to me. I had suggested she find a spiritual guide to hear it. I don't know that I would ever agree to that method of sponsorship - unless it was agreed in advance that someone else would hear the fifth step, or that we were close enough to travel to each other to do it.

I just agreed yesterday to "long-distance" sponsor someone, as I'm going to be spending the bulk of my week two hours from home. We worked out a loose e-mail and phone schedule, and we know we'll see each other at least one night a week at my home group meeting - but - she's four years sober and has done formal step work with someone else already.

Don't give up. Make friends and keep trying to expand your network of women. The right person who has what you want and can give what you need will come along.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

[austingemini]

Face to face (IMO)

[thinktoomuch]

SlvrMag -- can you get someone locally -- even if its just a temporary sponsor?

[SlvrMag]

Tonight I went to a womans meeting and found someone!!YEAH! I spoke with her a bit and I like her. In the short time we talked I found several things we have in common. At one point we even finished each others sentence!

[lizw]

I've been at a friends today who stopped going to NA meetings about a year ago, even though she's been clean 10 years. She talked a bit about feeling guilty over not being there for newcomers regarding sponsorship. She said it is quite common in NA, that just before 10 or around 10 members stop going.

Thanks for sharing, as I can now tell her your story and how important it is she go back.