Casual Sex versus Celibacy

[chiynita]

They say stay out of relationships for at least the first year of recovery. But some people need release. So your not really getting a relationship. Just gettin your rocks off and see ya later bye.
But I would be that way anyway.
Mostly with a man. With a woman. I may be more sensitive.
But men really only serve one purpose for me at the moment.
Sorry.I know thats really bad. But whatever.
I personally dont have the time nor the patience to deal with some realtionship BS in my life right now.
But needs are needs. Harsh ..Maybe. But it is what it is.

[lizw]

I'm on the man diet. Which means no men. Probably also means no woman too, but I've never been that way inclined anyhow.



I'm still waiting for the report back from butterfly woman too....

[kj3880]

My ex of 6 years ago, who I desperately loved, wants to have "casual sex." I'm not up for it. I know it would just open up the wounds and I'd be hurting again. I've never been able to do casual sex. I think women that can have sex without feeling emotions are kind of rare. I wish I could.
kj

[freya]

Originally Posted by kj3880

My ex of 6 years ago, who I desperately loved, wants to have "casual sex." I'm not up for it. I know it would just open up the wounds and I'd be hurting again. kj

That would not be possible for me either -- not with somebody I really cared about and had been with in a primary relationship...I don't know why exactly, but it just seems like there are certain things that one can't "go back" on.

[Butterflywoman]

I want a lover not a sexual partner. No just anyone. I had a guy in mind that I am attracted to but he says he does not believe in casual sex. So, for now, my sex life is on hold per the last 14 years. I don't know what the future holds.

[freya]

Butterflywoman:

Sorry for your disappointment.....but you can at least give yourself credit for putting it out there and discussing it with him (Really, I think it's great to know what you want and take the risk to try to get it in a direct and honest adult way!)...The whole situation must be very frustrating for you, but I know, for myself, whenever I am "working on" something and things aren't really going in the direction I'd like or that I'd think they should be going, the thing that seems to work best for me is just to hold it in my consciousness (gently, not in an obsessive "I'm gonna figure this out" way) and every time I connect with HP just kinda like say "I'm still working on this and I'm looking for some help/guidance from you"...and then, just really try to let it go and leave it up to HP...and eventually something just happens and the way is clear for me or the issue is resolved -- lots of times in a way that I never imagined but that is really better than any of the ways I imagined it working out....

freya

[51anna]

I am impressed with your honesty in this situation Butterflywoman and with his too.

[Katronia]

too many diseases

[Katronia]

you dont want meaningless sex just to satisfy a need - it might leave you feeling badly about yourself

[Butterflywoman]

I had no intention of having "meaningless sex." I liked this guy and we share a lot together. The sex would have been meaningful, but it would not have led to a romantic commitment. I agree that sex without emotion is for young people with raging hormones.